One of the major causes of STRESS; is conflict of values also called value crisis. One such conflict is between selfishness and selflessness. Let us resolve this conflict and conquer the STERSS!

The plant and animal life is apparently almost free from choices and hence almost free from such conflicts and the STRESS! We are however; evolved and �free� to make choices on the one hand; and are �trapped� in the conflicts of choices; on the other!

We need oxygen, water, food, protection, nursing, shelter, clothes, education, entertainment, pampering and so on!

Gradually our �needs� begin to get converted into �wants�! We start �wanting� better food, better protection, better nursing, better shelter, better clothes, better entertainment, more pampering and so on!

Soon, all these �wants� necessitate the physical, political and monetary power and thus �craving� for power is produced in us! The �craving� leads to all our actions to fulfill the �craving� irrespective of; or rather at the cost of others!

Strange it may appear, but; even if every craving of ours is fulfilled, we are still unsatisfied!

Barring the period of infancy, the different conflicting choices begin to hover around and produce STRESS and erosion!

Satisfaction of physiological needs, instincts, emotions, thoughts and behavior (selfishness) are influenced variably by ethics, rules, regulations, laws, conventions, traditions, religious precepts, commandments (selflessness)!

They create a conflict; �Whether to satisfy our interests or not?�! In other words; �should we be selfish or selfless? This causes STRESS!

The STRESS; is especially marked; because, neither can we; revert back to animal behavior and escape from the conflict; nor can we cope with the precepts of selflessness!

How to resolve this conflict?

As infants we are selfish (very happy) in suckling and as mothers we are selfless (very happy) in breast feeding! Aren�t selfishness and selflessness natural, complementary and inseparable parts of our life?

Hence; even if our cravings, wants and even needs are fulfilled (selfishness); the subtle desires that we should be heard, loved, respected, admired, cared for, obeyed served and so on; still remain active! Alternatively suppression of our needs, wants, desires, and cravings appears incompatible with life. Thus; in absence of satisfying the needs from the early childhood, we would not be alive and there would be no progeny to continue the species.

We can tally this with our experience of being �selfish� and the feeling of guilt for not having given a donation; and our experience of being �selfless� and the feeling of being cheated by giving away donations! We can assess our feeling of guilt; of selfishness (having denied our services to needy poor); and our feeling of hurt due to insulting treatment; of selflessness (having taught or treated free of cost).

Thus mere fulfilling (selfishness) or mere suppression or denial (selflessness); of our needs, wants, desires or cravings; is not a solution. Hence there must be other way out. Thus; what is required; is to evolve our selfishness as well as our selflessness!

Most of the times even if the others consider us selfish or selfless; we are actually not evolved in terms of selfishness or selflessness! We are only foolish; being dragged into ego-born compulsions; which are either called �selfish� or �selfless�!

One way of conquering the STRESS of this strenuous and tardy transition from selfishness and selflessness; to enlightened objective wisdom; is; the practice and propagation of NAMASMARAN. Practice; because �the love of NAMASMARAN�; is not as �strongly physiologically inbuilt� as the �compulsions of acquiring; and impulses of sacrificing� and propagate; because; we want to defeat the propaganda and forces (inside and outside); that hinder the culmination of selfishness and selflessness; into cosmic consciousness with its benevolent holistic expression!

STRESS AND SELFISHNESS: DR. SHRINIWAS KASHALIKAR

If we study the Total Stress Management and various philosophical and spiritual issues related to it; such as selfishness; then we face following questions!

1. Do we understand the difference between �self� and �Self�?

2. Do we practice; Self exploration, Self introspection?

3. Do we understand the signals of Self; constituting the agony or the satisfaction; generated from deep within?

4. Do we spend time to understand the propulsive, inspiring or motivating impulses or signals; coming from the Self i.e. from within?

5. Do we practice; Self expression, Self assertion; and Self satisfaction?

6. Don�t we suffer from Self pity, Self abnegation, Self ridicule, Self deride and Self guilt?

The answers to these questions are:

1. We do not understand the nature of Self.

One of the most important and logical proof of this is that; most of the times; we are merely elated or depressed; but never happy. We never experience fulfillment. Our life may be apparently beneficial or troublesome to others. But it lacks the element of simultaneous blossoming of one and all, which is possible only through �True Selfishness (not petty selfishness)�

2. We do not practice Self exploration and Self introspection adequately.

3. We do not understand the signals from within; as we do not introspect Self; adequately.

4. We do not express or assert our Self adequately and are not satisfied adequately.

5. We suffer from Self pity, Self abnegation, Self ridicule, Self deride and Self guilt.

This is because;

Our education system is heavily influenced and governed by the Self ignorance, fragmented, superficial and petty perspective, reductionist and sectarian thinking, misguided motives, and inappropriate aims, objectives, ideals and protocols! This leads to individualistic but anti Self pursuits. Our whole life is drained in the anti Self petty pursuits instead of Self exploration, Self knowledge, Self realization and Self expression.

Besides education system and the curriculums, all the fields of life such as laws, health care, agriculture, industry, trade, entertainment and even our belief systems, which constitute informal and extracurricular education; are also; heavily vitiated by the ignorance of Self. Hence our curricular, co-curricular and extracurricular education is unable to train and inspire us for Self exploration and Self realization.

Hence we do not know and are not on the way to explore, understand and realize the true Self. We are guided by darkness and grope in the wilderness of degradation, degeneration and destruction of ourselves and the others; and hence in true sense; we are Self less or Self traitors or suicidal!

We can be Selfish; involving simultaneous blossoming of one and all; through NAMASMARAN; the vital heritage and crucial legacy; that has come from the seers; through millennia. This valuable treasure has come to us in a noble and sublime manner; through supertransactions; beyond commercial, professional and charitable perspectives!

Total Stress Management (the core of which is NAMASMARAN); is being truly Selfish; through Self introspection, Self exploration, Self knowledge, Self realization, Self assertion and Self expression by conquering the petty self within us and within the society we live in!

STRESS AND SUPERJOY: DR. SHRINIWAS KASHALIKAR

In childhood; we get joy from simple observations; such as a chemical reaction, illumination of a bulb or fire resulting from striking of a match stick.

For us; joy means good food, good clothes, and toys and pampering with other things. It could as well be hugging, cuddling, patting on back or a kiss. Latter it may be associated with adolescent romance and latter still; with material possession, social prestige, accolade from society, political power, art in various forms, and creativity in different fields!

When we are deprived of these sources of joy; we get STRESS!

As we evolve further; (which is not exactly linear or sequential and may be simultaneous with above phenomena) a new experience begins to emerge. This experience is of joy without chemical reaction, without illumination of a bulb, and without striking a match stick! This is not a joy of mere fulfillment of some needs, wants and desires.

This is a joy of being in the core of everything including the chemical process, the electricity, the fire and also all our needs, wants and desires. We have now got freed (tyaga) from the realm of; and bondage of reactive happiness; that results from and depends on; the fulfillment of our needs, wants and desires! We have got rid (tyaga) of our felt needs, felt wants and felt desires.

This is very difficult to imagine in absence of its experience and often we consider this as negation of nature and/or escapism from the struggle of life!

But this tyaga; is actually �returning or withdrawing from our periphery and reestablishing or merging with our center or our core�! In this state we become one with the core of the universe and freed (tyaga) from the bondage and dragging; by the fleeting aspects of universe! This is sublimation of one�s personality into cosmic spirit, cosmic consciousness or absolute consciousness.

In the 12th chapter of Gita there is a verse, stating that through study; we get knowledge, through knowledge we achieve dhyana, through dhyana we practice karmafalatyaga and through tyaga, we attain shanti i.e. peace.

If we consider the life as a learning (abhyasa) process and our experience of life as knowledge, (jnana) then the culmination of such knowledge; is the everlasting unconditional joy in the very process of whatever we do (dhyana), and the state of freedom from every kind of subjectivity and disturbances(tyaga). This is a state of extraordinary ecstasy, which is not an idle or resting state; but a state of, �being transtemporal living space� or cosmic consciousness (shanti)!!

Persons freed from subjective considerations, judgments and interests, are called free souls; MUKTATMAs, yogis, seers, enlightened people, saints, sages, rishis and super humans. They provide universal solace and solution through their life.


The practical step or the process to realize this state; is NAMASMARAN; which has been illumining thousands of generations from time immemorial and will continue to illumine the thousands of generations to come; all over the world!

The apparent feature of tyaga is withering away of all the commercial or professional considerations! Transition from childhood to this state is NOT easy.

Careful observation suggests that we; the billions of people all over the world; perceive, feel and behave; �from our periphery�; in a rather unevolved and hence uncooperative, contradictory and opposing manner. This is why we are in disharmony, discord and at loggerheads with one another.

Moreover; physical pain; sorrows, conflicts, and the irritation or agony of absurdity or injustice and depression of everything ephemeral; bring inexplicable and insurmountable agony! These take over our consciousness and make us miserable, no matter how much moneyed, powerful, influential, popular or erudite we are! Those; who do not feel this way today are bound to feel so; some time latter!

It is essential to realize that; even though while practicing NAMASMARAN we can get the glimpses of SUPERJOY; the fuller appreciation would ensue; as and when people all over the world; practice NAMASMARAN; and tangible individual and global blossoming begins to prevail!

Like the deprivation other instincts; deprivation of the basic emotion of love and affection; also being one of the causes of STRESS; charity (dearness and affection) is logically one of the important measures of STRESS management also!

The word �charity� has its root in the old French and Latin; and literally means dearness and affection. Thus the acts of charity give us gratification of fulfilling our need to express our affection; in as much as it benefits many people around us. This is why most of the religions and ideologies; have upheld charity as adorable value and virtue.

Being uncharitable, callous, crude and indifferent to the needs of other people; is actually being blind to our own heart; and suffer from STRESS; and infect and inflict others! Being uncharitable; is being violent to ourselves and also to others.

Having said this; is being charitable enough to manage stress totally?

This is an important question; because we live in a period; when our charity is usually adulterated knowingly or unknowingly with our petty motivations and/or gullibility. Thus while being charitable; we tend to extract political, social and other varieties of advantages; or get cheated!

But; even if charity is unadulterated; it cannot evolve us; from being fraudulent, corrupt, exploitative, cheating, swindling and so on! We do no really blossom from within; by practicing mere charity!

Charity in itself; being a palliative; though egalitarian and commendable action (response, measure, solution); does not reach and act on the roots of the social and political stressors (evils) viz. sectarian perspectives, policies, plans, programs, administrative machinery, laws, rules, conventions etc, which continue to produce STRESS; at individual and global levels and harm us.

This is why; practice of charity even if it is sincere; can not give emotional gratification to the discerning individuals, who are often suffocated in absence of charity; but feel cheated by the practice of charity!

Different kind of charity is involved in subsidy, free health care, free education, reservations on the basis of caste. It is generated and nurtured and proliferated by consensus born out of motivations, temptations, meekness, lassitude, indolence, parasitism, irresponsibility and vengeance; to the government.

In turn; we get addicted to �live as liability on the others; by exploiting �the dearness and affection and Herculean efforts; i.e. others� charity�! We begin to despise work; sincerity, accountability, service, dedication, merit etc. and keep on taking pride in asking for or begging for more at the cost of others; as if it is our right! We go on growing as beggars and seekers. In the course of time we begin indulging in poisonous propaganda; unleashing indiscriminate violence and creating STRESS for everyone. This is worst mismanagement of STRESS and harmful to others.

The government, which adopts such populist policies; harms the society in terms of throttling holistic blossoming of one and all!

Thus whether we do charity or get benefited by some one else�s charity; we have to realize that; MERE CHARITY is not sufficient and in fact proves to be counterproductive; in the long run. Many examples can be given to prove this point.

This scenario of failure of �charity� in every way; is evident in the increasing number and lengths of queues in front of many public hospitals, restaurants, temples, churches, mosques, shrines; for charity; in India.

In summary, charity in the long run; throttles us; in pride, arrogance, condescending attitude, bloated ego; or beggary, parasitism, meekness, and irresponsibility and antisocial indiscriminate violence!

In some situations; charity could be the only and essential solution; for individual gratification and social relief; e.g. accidents, natural calamities, droughts.

But today; in general; a holistic perspective, policies, plans and programs; for fulfilling our physiological needs such as procreation, hunger, thirst, locomotion, living in our habitat, living in our herd, parental care, working; love for the peers, respect for the elders, kind care for the weak and handicapped, and dispassionate, selfless and surgical violence against malignant indiscriminate coercion and violence (punishments and PRAYASHCHITTA). This is essence of SWADHARMA.

SWADHARMA is evolved and refined form of charity and appropriate solution in the form of proactively allocated (individually and globally blossoming) duty; to different individuals; at different stages of life; according different personal and social relationships, different seasons and different auspicious days! Through SWADHARMA; our subjective feelings, fancies, idiosyncrasies, whims and choices evolve into objective ones; and blossom in globally beneficial motivations and actions.

The importance of SWADHARMA is that it does not give rise to bloating of our condescending attitude and ego on the one hand (givers); and destruction and/or humiliation of our self esteem; on the other (seekers)!

In Hindu culture that I am aware of; the SWADHARMA has been in practice; in the form of various responsibilities or obligations; conceptualized as �paying off loans or debts�. Debt is called RUNA in Sanskrit; e.g. PITRU RUNA (debt of father), MATRU RUNA (debt of mother), and SAMAJ RUNA (debt of society). �Repaying these loans� is called SWADHARMA. Thus there are PUTRA DHARMA (the sacred obligations of a son), MATRU DHARMA (sacred obligations of a mother), PITRU DHARMA (sacred obligations of a father), RAJA DHARMA (sacred obligations or responsibilities of a king).

This DHARAMA prevalent in the different stages of life; is called ASHRAMA DHARMA. Thus the DHARMA in student stage is that of (BRAHMACHARYA ASHRAMA), married family person�s stage (GRUHASTHA ASHRAMA), retired stage (VANAPRASTHA ASHRAMA) and stage of transcendental renouncement or renunciation (SANYASA ASRHAMA).

Thus; a BRAHMACHARI student is expected to observe austerity and celibacy and study. This is obviously a wise thing if practiced intelligently and with insight; if one considers the individual and social loss e.g. menace of AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases, problems of unmarried mothers and most importantly thwarting of sublime aspirations and becoming corrupt slaves of our petty self; due to temptation, diversion, distraction and fixation of our mind on physical, sexual and material pleasures.

The GRUHASTHA or family person had the sacred duty of offering hospitality to a guest (ATITHI). The ATITHI could be any one and not necessarily a friend or a relative. ATITHI served a benevolent purpose for the society; as a pilgrim, a trader, an entertainer, a social scientist and in any case a uniting force amongst the people in different places.

The stage of retired life and the stage of renunciation (VANAPRASTHA and SANYASA) were characterized by consultative activities. The VANAPRASTHA and SANYASA; meant for being promoted to impartial judgments, instructing in day to day routine and providing guidance in spiritual quests. There is no escapist or self depriving connotation in any of these; and in any way.

The concept of SWADHARMA is akin to the role of a cell in maintenance of internal environment i.e. homeostasis. Thus just as a cell participates in homeostasis in subservience to the health of its own; and of the organism; similarly an individual participates in social homeostasis in subservience to the health of his or her own; and the health of the society.

Since the fabric of the Indian society has been unidentifiably damaged and mutilated repeatedly; the revival of the old SWADHARMA; does not seem plausible, possible and probable. But we can understand and practice the essence of SWADHARMA; through rectification of our cognition, affect and conation; through NAMASMARAN, which catalyzes the evolution of our subjectivity, into objective consciousness, global perspective, global thinking, global policies and globally beneficial administration and implementation in our own field.

To put it more explicitly; a doctor would work for the advent of holistic medicine, a lawyer would work for holistic laws which would provide not merely punishment but PRAYASCHITTA (opportunity for one�s individual and social welfare), an educationist would evolve holistic education (which nurtures spiritual, cognitive, affective, psychomotor and productive domains of a child); in terms of policy making, planning and implementation.

This is the evolution from CHARITY to SWADHARMA through NAMASMARAN (which Lord Krishna and the other seers have intensely and earnestly advocated for millennia) and is the core of the Total Stress Management that can eradicate the evils such as; child labor, begging, slum dwelling, pavement dwelling, diseases, handicaps, pollution etc.

It has to be reiterated that NAMASMARAN; can work far more benevolently; than what has been conceived and articulated here.

Many of us often articulate our STRESS; as;

�I am not able to identify myself amidst own images made and broken.

I am not able to identify you because of your camouflage of urges and cravings.

I am not able to recognize them because of my own observing capacity full of prejudices and presumptions.

I am not able to perceive the light amongst the weirdly moving shadows inside and outside.

I am not able to listen to the music amongst the cacophony inside and outside.

I am not able to even live as myself due to �my� separation from my true self

I am under stress due to increasing chasm between my �self� and me; due to continuous bombardment of petty pains and pleasures

The anxiety, tension, worry, fear, indolence, inertia, indifference, disinterestedness, lowliness, resentment, depression, misery and helplessness also; spring from; the combined metabolic, endocrine, autonomic and central nervous activities.

In other words; the ongoing interactions between the whole body and the brain; and the surroundings; leads to the different moods and various actions in perspective, thoughts, feelings, passions and body.

If we are able to govern these, then we can manage the stress arising out of these! But who governs this whole panorama at present?

Some call it God, some call it nature. Some call it �Self� implying ATMAN. Some say there is no cause or governance! But be that as it may; are we to simply get helplessly dragged after all these interactions and the stress?

No. But mere intellectual explanations; and theoretical discussions, arguments and deliberations and controversies on the intricacies involved in Total Stress Management; without actual experimentation; don�t work.

We have to reach the seeds of our being; the seeds of our happiness! The practice and propagation of NAMASMARAN; however; reaches and nurtures these seeds of our being and the happiness blossoms as follows:

The random dance of the being�.
The bubbling frenzy of living�
The vigorous restlessness of moving�.

The haunting fragrances�
The tempting tastes�.
The mesmerizing melodies�.

The reassuring and loving words�.
The hilarious jokes and fun�..
The awesome grandeur and glamour...

The stirring and stunning attraction�
The captivating bonds and memories...
The protracted incompleteness �.

The throbbing of heart �.
The inevitable union �.
The fulfillment of caring and rearing...

The queer calls of heart and soul�.
The endless drag towards unknown�.
The burning motivation for justice

The unending inexplicability�
The exploding turmoil�
The helplessness of impotency�.

The vastness of universe �.
The versatility of human genius�.
The humility of one�s frailty�.

The unifying diversity
The innate yet ubiquitous orchestra�
The harmony of moments �.

All living within us!

If we take the analogy of disturbance in electric supply; for stress; then Total Stress Management is like actually reaching he powerhouse of the electricity and making all rectification there; and not merely discussing the wiring, voltage, changing the bulbs etc.

It is like being a king; and NOT merely discussing and gossiping about the kings, their politics and bravery; or enacting the role of kings in a drama or movie!

We need not believe (or disbelieve) in anything from all of this; blindly or even with open eyes! Instead; it is better to accept provisionally; think over, study and give Total Stress Management (the core of which is NAMASMARAN) a fair trial, if and when we feel (and we abound to feel) the urge!